Category Archives: Resolutions

I hit rock bottom. Here’s what happened.

 

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I hit rock bottom, landed on the scale and gained nine pounds in November.  My rock bottom came to a crescendo last Sunday night. After a month of stress and too many cheat days ( plus Thanksgiving)  I dove head first into a dead lasagna that was sitting in the window at work.  If you have been reading my blog for two years I wait tables for extra money, and lately I am working a lot more than usual. The stress of things in life finally got to me, and all of a sudden I was craving the kind of foods I only eat once or twice a year. Pasta is a no-no for me, and frankly I do not even want it and everyone is always marveled by my willpower of steel. I knew I was in trouble when I started wanting pasta  more and more in November. This is not a good thing when you work in an Italian Restaurant and have to serve it every day. One little cheat turned into another and all of a sudden I am grabbing for a lasagna that was past its prime. I was mindless eating, no joy, not a special occasion cheat that I earned and savored; but just eating because it was there and I needed to ease the pain of my temporary worries and stresses.   I came crashing down from a month of nonsensical eating like an addict after a high. For me it was my first real low point in two years after my 60 pound weight loss and all of my fitness accomplishments. I hit rock bottom, got on the scale the very next day and immediately gained my composure and will power. Being human is a tough gig.

Cue December 1, 2015 and a reality check, I  gained  9 lbs. My first weight gain since I began my project and blog. I had maintained my weight loss for two years and was working on my fitness goals and eventually my weight loss goal of 135 lbs. In November I lost control. It happened so quickly I hardly knew what hit me. I do know this, the minute I got on the scale and saw where my month of excess of unhealthy food led me, I snapped back into gear. Mind you, I have never been a overeater and I never considered myself an emotional eater. I have rarely been a binger, but for me choosing high calorie, fattening, carb ridden foods over healthy foods was all it took for me to put on some weight. My first clue is when my bra was a little tighter. Then I knew, and I knew it was time to face the music. The music sang loud and clear, you  gained 9 lbs. The scale is a cruel wake up call but a necessary bitter pill you must swallow before 9 lbs turns into 60 lbs. I caught myself before it is too late. The honesty of the scale diminished any cravings I had. I was back.

Today I begin anew. I am doing a Melissa Bender Fitness 30 day challenge and I am back to eating clean and watching my portion control. I am going to run again as well. I have not been on a run since since my 5K in October. I am also doing one charity per month now, until my scale moves in my favor. In November I collected donations for the Second Harvest Food Bank and volunteered with my friend Stan and his hiking/running/meetup group at the Second Harvest Food Bank in San Jose. Stan is such an inspiration to me, and he has run over 20 marathons. For me this blog began blending my weight loss and fitness goals with  giving back to charity, and now I continue that by doing one charity a month and get back to what works for me. I am far from over.

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In life I do not ask for advice, I am always going to do what I feel anyway. I look for inspiration. Inspiration is all around us, and learning from others never gets old. Sometimes inspiration comes from unlikely sources, but you must listen and have an open heart. I am happy to say I am surrounded by inspiration always, from family, from friends, from strangers I meet on my travels. Here’s to better days ahead and the inspirational people who accompany me on my journey. Love and light to all. 

There would be no cloud-nine days without rock-bottom moments left below.     — Richelle E. Goodrich

Namaste’

Rose

 

NEW MONDAY

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Sometimes it is so easy to get side tracked, everything just seems to pile up and there is little time to do what you want to do because of adult responsibilities and pressures.The good news is my Mother is home and on medication and feeling well. I made my best time at my 5k and now I am looking for a 10k to do before the year ends.

I am wearing so many hats of late; wife, waitress, author, weight loss/philanthropic blogger, fitness enthusiast, yogi, not to mention I am a poet and writer and I prefer to have some alone time to get out of my body and into my head to translate my thoughts into words. My book is getting great reviews and it is low on stock at Bookshop Santa Cruz, so I am incredibly grateful. There is a lot more work to do on the book front, (marketing wise) but I am taking it one day at a time. I will be heading back to Santa Cruz soon, and soon to LA as well. 

Yoga and working out gets me out of my head and into my body, and my writing takes me deep within. When I have to work extra hours waiting tables, it takes me to a place of chaos and stress. Do not get me wrong, I am appreciative of the ability to make some extra cash since we live in the most expensive city in the states, but to say I am burned out it is an understatement. I do not get home usually until 11 pm and i have felt physically exhausted. I had a mini meltdown last Thursday and I ate a bowl of pasta Alfredo. My first pasta in one year. I deviated from my workout routine and I was beginning to feel out of control. I spoke to Melissa from Melissa Bender Fitness and she suggested I just pick up where I left off.

It took that phone call and  a beautiful day in the city along the coast with my husband James and our dear friends Sara and Tor to help me regain my balance. When I am in nature and with amazing souls, I find my zen and my meditation place.  I also realized no matter how late I get home, I need to be in bed within the hour. It has made all the difference and today on this brand new Monday Morning I begin anew. 

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I went to bed I believe before one am, and I woke up by ten am. I am now writing and having my coffee and ThinkThin bar and soon I will do my workout. I have plenty of time before work and I feel like this week I may regain my center. I have chosen to really focus on the fitness after my first over 50 lb weight loss, since my weight has been forever stuck in the 160’s. I recently found out all the female members of my immediate family are on medication for thyroid issues, so that is something to explore in the future. As soon as the chaos and money issues quiet down and I am able to slow down I will be deciding on my next charities.  In the meantime, eat healthy, workout, work, do yoga, run off the stress and repeat. One day at a time is not a cliche’ it is the best way to get through any difficult situation. Keep going and never give up!! 

Namaste’ love and light

This week I am repeating week five.

So here is week 1 Month 2 of BenderFitness Bikini Prep Workouts

 
 
Tuesday Day 2: Bikini Ready Tummy Workout and Body Definition Workout (Body Definition Workout was done interval style, 2X through. The breakdown is listed in the information above the Bikini Ready Tummy Workout). 
 
Wednesday Day  3: Strong and Toned Lower Body: Legs, Thighs, and Butt and 30 minute run on the treadmill. Day off from work
 
Thursday Day 4Ab Exposure Workout
 

FRIDAY UPDATES

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Good Morning to all, I have been out of commission and I have not updated in two weeks. That ends now. I plan to not only update my social media, but to spend more time writing here. I was sick with a kidney infection and believe it or not this week I have caught a bugger of a cold. That will not stop me, but it has slowed me down just a pinch. On top of that this brand new computer was a lemon. Time to make lemon-aid since it has been a scorcher here lately. 

My first update is SFYogamagazine featured my weight loss story on their website. It was quite an honor and I will include a link when I have more time.

I am an author now. Yes, I can finally say my first book Camellia in Snow has been released and is now available on amazon and barnesandnoble.com b
I am thrilled and beyond grateful to my amazing publisher Finnlady Press. My book will also be available at select independent bookstores across the country, this is why I have been busy. The first book store you can purchase Camellia in Snow at is BookShop Santa Cruz 1520 Pacific Avenue Santa Cruz, CA 95060 #831-423-0900. The other book stores I will announce as I make the rounds. I have been very busy with my workouts and training and work.

Speaking of my training. Tomorrow is my first 5K since my 5K in 2014 that turned into an accidental 10K. I am so excited, I am running with my boss who has run 26 marathons. Yes, 26 marathons. I am a bit intimidated but I plan to run without stopping. We are running in the Rock and Roll Marathon series San Jose 5K. He is also doing the half marathon on Sunday, I think he is not of this world. He is inspiring to me especially because he started running during a crisis. I will write more about him later.

Ok I am off, I will begin posting my Melissa Bender Workout schedule next week after the race, and I plan to update my sidebar with links to my book etc. Today I work and I have to go pick up my race packet so I must get moving quick. I need a caturday soon. 

Much Love and Light to alL

Namaste’

Rose

 

BACK TO THE GRIND

Good Morning to all. Labor day is behind us and now it is time to get back to work. I have a lot of  exciting things going on and I will post all about them in tomorrow’s post. Today it is all about the work, the workout, and back to the grind. I have Melissa Bender Fitness schedule, this is week 1 of Month 2. I am doing great but I admit I am a little more fatigued as of late, because of later nights than usual. I am trying to get to bed at a more reasonable time so I can have the energy to do the best workouts possible. A little coffee helps too. I hope you are crushing your own personal goals. Make sure you find time to stretch and do a yoga flow to recover and soothe your mind and body. I downloaded some amazing Hawaiian music to do sun salutations to. Here is a photo update. On far Left is the beginning photo in 2013, and in the middle is me 5 weeks ago, and the far right is me now. I am still stocky but you can see I am much more lean and fit than I once was. I actually had someone tell me not to lose my body, that made me feel amazing. Oh, and someone told me I looked like Shania Twain and Sandra Bullock, which to me translates to my face is skinny lol. 11947697_1005430582835741_1320152200900790489_nNamaste’

Love and Light

Rose

So here is week 1 Month 2 of BenderFitness Bikini Prep Workouts

 
Tuesday Day 1: Body Definition Workout
 
Wednesday Day 2: Bikini Ready Tummy Workout and Body Definition Workout (Body Definition Workout was done interval style, 2X through. The breakdown is listed in the information above the Bikini Ready Tummy Workout). 
 
Thursday Day 3: Strong and Toned Lower Body: Legs, Thighs, and Butt and 30 minute run on the treadmill. Day off from work
 
Friday Day 4Ab Exposure Workout
Saturday Day 7: Off Saturday Day off from work
 

SPILLED COFFEE

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Don’t cry over spilled milk, or in my case spilled coffee. I woke up, late as usual as on par for my life these days. I decided before my workout to blog in bed.  I thought drinking coffee in bed was a grand idea until I spilled it all over myself and my blanket. It seems to be indicative of my murky mood. The last few months have been a little chaotic, a lot of good and some not so good. I will not get into the details of the not good part, but I will say I have my health, and those I love do as well so it is nothing that cannot be figured out. Crisis can come on in all ways, it can burn you like hot coffee if you let it. Or you can stand up, wash it off and get on with your life and your dreams. That hot coffee is not going to ruin your day, nor should a minor life crisis singe your dreams and goals. Make a wish, and it will come true if you believe. 

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I promised myself I would move forward each day, taking one moment at a time. Coming from an impatient person as myself that is probably the most difficult task. I want everything now, and I tend to get a little cranky when things move too slow for my liking. I understand that is a flaw in my personality and I am constantly trying to evolve and become a better version of myself. I have stuck to my workout schedule even when things became difficult. Last week my body was slower than usual. My injured toe seemed to be hurting more than usual, and doing some of the exercises proved difficult. I took my rest day Saturday and now I feel better. I understand my toe will probably eventually need surgery, but I am just trying for now to keep moving forward and keep on the road to goal. 

With that said, I have decided to repeat last weeks schedule. Here it is, and this week I am feeling better physically and I hope I come out of this repeat week stronger. That is the goal anyway, To be stronger, more fit, healthier and to be leaner as I achieve my goals. Thank you to Melissa Bender Fitness for amazing workouts and helping me motivate and stay on the right track. The photo above shows my progress. Far left 2013, middle four weeks ago to date, and far right is current. I am making progress, I just have to be patient with myself and trust in the universe that everything will be fine. Love and light to all.

 

Happy Monday

Rose

Melissa Bender Fitness Week Four Bikini Prep Workout (repeat)

Monday: 15 Minute Home Workout

Tuesday: 3 mile run

Wednesday: 10 Minute Fat Burn

Thursday: Flab-U-Less Arms and Abs, 30 Minutes Cardio

Friday:Fitness Transformation: Workout 5, 30 Minutes Cardio

Saturday: Off 

Sunday: Mix It Up Workout, 30 Minutes Cardio

 

Motivation Monday

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Good Morning to all. It is another Monday. I am on the brink of some amazing things happening and I feel like I am about to take flight. Some big changes may be happening as well.  My book will be out soon and I will do a whole separate blog post to announce it. With the book release comes events to be planned, and contacting the independent book stores that agreed to carry my book. I have a small but wonderful  small  east coast press publishing my book and most of the marketing is on me. One of my poems in the book has a line, “change comes on slow than rolls you over.” That statement could not be more true for this moment and time, and I am just trying to focus on my daily goals as I wait impatiently for the change to happen. I will come out better on the other side if I continue to focus on my daily and weekly goals. Large goals cannot be obtained without the daily little goals you set for yourself.

 Robert Frost once said, “The best way out is through” 

So here I am, week three of my Melissa Bender Fitness Bikini Prep workouts and challenge. It is Monday and I am motivated. I am taking it day by day, and week by week. I had a cheat day over the weekend and I realized there was a reason why I rarely had cheat days. They just do not make me feel good. I would rather use a few of my extra points and count in a mini treat than have a day that makes me feel ill and cheats my goals. That is just me. I hope you are chasing down your goals and living in the moment.

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Here is the breakdown of my weeks schedule of workouts, again tailored for my Monday-Friday Schedule. You can find these workouts a www.benderfitness.com and I am on week three, month one of the 12 weeks. My weight is still stuck in the 160’s but I will get to the 150’s as I focus on fitness, strength and health; and I plan to share a home yoga schedule soon. Happy Monday to all and remember to love the body you are in as you focus on the body you want. You only get one so love it as you love others and it will love you back. 

Namaste’

Rose

 

Day 15: Monday Full Body Home Workout, 30 Minute Cardio

Day 16: Tuesday Home Workout For a Tight Body

Day 17: Wednesday  Improve Your Rear View Workout 30 Minutes Cardio

Day 18: Thursday Fitness Transformation: Workout 4, 30 Minutes Cardio

Day 19: Friday 30 Minutes Cardio

Day 23: Saturday Off

Day 22:Sunday  Full Body Shaping Home Workout

 

 

WEIGHT WATCHERS ONLINE

I remember when I began this journey, my weigh ins were on Tuesday. I decided picking Tuesday as a weigh in was a great way to stay on track over the weekend. I also did Weight Watchers in the beginning, but I found with my schedule and my workouts it was hard for me to make it to meetings. Flash forward to today, I decided now that I have an iphone doing Weight Watchers online with the app was the way to get my weight to goal. I can keep track at the touch of my fingertips. For me food is always an issue, not eating too much or the wrong things but just skipping it completely and drinking a shake. Food was a chore.When I went out of town a few weeks ago I went on a little binge and actually gained 11 lbs and I realized that is a slippery slope.

This week I begin my third week of Weight Watchers Online with the WW app and I am loving it. I track everything that I eat and drink. The first week I lost 5 lbs and this week I lost 2 lbs with a total of 7 lbs since I signed up two weeks ago. My current weight is 169 lbs, up 4 lbs from my lowest weight. I gained a couple pounds when I went out of town and now I am tacking those pesky pounds with four more to go to get to where I was. Once I am at 165 lbs I am picking a charity and moving on to the My Change For a Ten format, getting myself to 155 lbs.

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I am also working out and running with Melissa Bender Fitness as my guide, my intention is to become strong, flexible, and be able to tackle all of my fitness bucket list items.

Through this slippery slope of change I am landing on my feet. Love and Light to all and keep on keeping on.

Namaste’

Rosebf

 

 

HEALTHY VEGETABLE SOUP

I just entered week two of my newest journey since I started this blog two years ago. I joined Weight Watchers Online last Tuesday to lose the eleven pounds I gained when I was away the fourth of July weekend, and to break my plateau. How did I gain that much weight in three days? Welcome to my struggle. If you do not know I lose weight slowly, and that may be do to an adrenal tumor and too much Cortisol. I work very hard, but for me slipping up causes havoc on my body. That is why I rarely do it. I lost over 50 lbs on my own and now I feel I need the help of Weight Watchers to help me keep track of my food and help to get the scale moving again. That with my running, yoga, and Melissa Bender Fitness workouts and guidance I should be able to take this to another level. I slip up a little, and the scale moves forward a lot. I have no room for error it seems. I sometimes feel like I have the worst metabolism ever, but I challenge it and come out fighting. I never give up and this will not happen again. Weight Watchers will help me to not make that mistake again, it is not extreme and easy to stay on track. I am afraid I was getting to obsessive with food and I ended up on a holiday weekend splurge as the result of eating too little.vegsoup

Today I am happy to report I lost five of those eleven pounds with six more pounds to get to what I call my fighting weight. I am now 171 lbs.  After I get back to 165, I plan on picking a charity and losing the next ten pounds and getting to 155. I will never have a three day cheat day again, it really did me in. Moving forward,  I am excited and motivated and enjoying my Weight Watchers Online experience. The WW app makes it a game changer for me with my new smart phone. I got  this. My final goal is around 135 lbs.

This was my dinner last night, and it was Fabulous.

This recipe is a combination of all the soups I make, and Weight Watchers zero points vegetable soup. I have formatted it how I like all of my soups. I took my recipes and their Weight Watchers Vegetable soup and came up with this. You can be really creative and use any fresh or frozen vegetables you have on hand. You can even add legumes if you want it to be a bit heartier. This is your soup, make it as you please and it will please everyone who eats it. It really was a fantastic Meatless Monday dinner. My version has 1 point because I choose to use oil in my soups, if you beans 1 cup would be 3 points.

1 oz of Parmesan cheese would add 3 points, as would one oz or Soy Faux Parmesan cheese.

Manga’

HEALTHY VEGETABLE SOUP

  •   4 cloves garlic, minced   
  •   2 medium uncooked carrots, diced   
  •   2 cups green beans, fresh 
  •   2 cup(s) (shredded) uncooked savoy cabbage, or other variety, shredded   
  •   1 cup diced zucchini
  •   1 medium uncooked onions, diced  
  •   half cup uncooked celery, diced   
  •   2 tsp fresh basil, chopped   
  •   2 cartons reduced sodium vegetable broth   
  •   1 large can diced tomatoes
  •    1 can tomato paste
  •   2 Tbsp fresh parsley, or chives, fresh, chopped
  •   1/2 tsp table salt, or to taste    1/4 tsp black pepper, or to taste  
  •   1 can legumes of your choice, low sodium. (optional)

 

  • Instructions

Saute’ onions, carrots and celery in 2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil until clear, about 5 minutes. Add garlic and saute’ 2 more minutes. Add tomato paste and stir. Add 2 cartons vegetable broth and 1 can of tomatoes, and all vegetables and seasonings, and simmer for 30 minutes.

This is super easy, and if you like you can add a can of beans, low sodium of course. I used great northern beans and added it after 20 minutes. A little sprinkle of Parmesan cheese really makes this feel like a decadent Italian soup.

Manga’

Rose

 

IN FLIGHT

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When I lived in Connecticut I had a manager where I worked, he told me I was a butterfly and I needed to slow down and stay put. It is obvious that I have not headed that advice because since then I have done anything but slow down. I have lived in so many interesting places, never slowing down. NYC, LA, now the San Francisco Bay Area. These places have shaped me, my writing, and my whole world. Of course it is my partner in life and husband James who has made all of this possible, that never goes unnoticed.

I have been so  overwhelmed with a lot of things in my life, good things but even so a bit overwhelmed. I have slacked off on my daily posts on this blog and that is going to change right this minute. My book Camellia in Snow is in the process of being completed thanks to FinnLady Press back east, and there are details that have been a little all consuming. Now I am going to make the time for both my loves, my blog and my book. They are not one in the same but in a way they are, they are the essence of my being. Without this blog and my weight loss my confidence would have never returned. I had the chance to have my poetry book published back in 2010 and I passed because of my move to Los Angeles. I had a second chance in 2013 and I passed again when I saw my photo from the open mic. I just had lost all confidence and I needed to find myself again. 

Here I find myself, in 2015 and 50 lbs lighter with a lot of help from my friends and mentors in life. My friends are my teachers and I am eternally grateful.  I am a former dancer who hated running, and now I absolutely love it. I am a fitness buff and ambassador to Melissa Bender Fitness and clean eater. I love my blog which combines weight loss/fitness with philanthropy and I am looking into ways to make it grow and do a lot more good in the communities I live in, now and moving forward. I am planning all kinds of fitness milestones like surfing and running the Golden Gate Bridge, this time four or five times. All of this with my first poetry book coming out in a few months, along with book events to do locally and in LA and back in my hometown of Cleveland, Ohio. I still also play waitress in the evenings. Yes, I have been busy but I would not have it any other way. My motto is you can do anything at any age as long as you believe. All you need is a strong desire and belief in yourself, and maybe a little morning coffee. You deserve everything you dream of and more. Namaste’ Love and Light to all. 

Rose

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Best Foot Forward

I am on day nine of my workouts that I am doing since I became a fitness ambassador for Melissa Bender Fitness.I am doing the 12 weeks of bikini competition workouts and feeling great. http://www.benderfitness.com/2013/02/my-first-bikini-competition-prep-month.html

I ran to the running store yesterday, since I do have my share of challenges as I progress. I have a foot/toe injury and I feel so much better when I have inserts from a running store. It takes the pressure of the front of my foot and it really makes a difference how my feet feel all day. I am now putting my best foot forward and chasing after my goals pain free.
My diet is on track and you can find my food journal on my facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/MyChangeForATen
When I work I usually eat the same things in the am and afternoon, to make it easier to plan.
Week two is underway, and I am so happy to be back in the swing of things. I had two months off from the move and it really depressed me, I need those endorphins.
I am looking into doing a raffle for my next charity, and raffling off something exciting. The photo on this post holds a hint of what I will be raffling off. I have not been on the scale in a while, since I have been focusing on my fitness and clean eating and trying not to obsess. I will do another weigh in soon and I am purchasing a new scale tonight since mine broke in my move.
Off for my day, I admit I am a little sleepy this morning, it is that darn San Francisco fog. Much different then the LA sun I am used to.
Happy Transformation Tuesday to allplaystation
Namaste’