Category Archives: in a crisis

MIGHT AS WELL JUMP

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If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.

Lao Tzu

Happy Thursday to all. It’s been well over a month since I posted, things literally changed in less than a months time. I always say change comes on slow and then runs you over. We wanted to move back to West Hollywood so I decided to make it happen. Blogging had to take a hiatus so I could take the time to find a new home and move back to Los Angeles where my blog began. I decided it was now or never. Now was the time to make things happen and move in the direction of our dreams.

James and I were listening to Van Halen one night after I got home from work. I admit, I was never a fan of the band my husband adored until this particular moment. The lyrics “Might As Well Jump” resonated with me deeply. I started to think, why are we here and what would it take to make a big leap and move back to the city where we were at our most happiest? We wished to move back to West Hollywood but finding an apartment while you are living in a different city can be daunting.

James happened to find a listing and we spontaneously called and set up an appointment to see the apartment. Within hours of getting home from a long shift, I got on Caltrain to San Jose and took a bus to Hollywood. There I met my friends and saw the apartment. Not too thrilled with it, and the process took longer than I expected so I was forced to stay the night. That night  James happened to come across an email about an apartment right in the heart of our favorite neighborhood and by the end of the next day I had the keys to our new home. It was perfect in every sense, and the whole process was Kismet.  (Kismet, that moment when everything just seems to align perfectly, right time, right place, right people).  We were renting from lovely people in a prime location. I loved the apartment and already pictured us with our cats there. Flash forward to today, we have been here almost a month and we could not be happier. 

Might as well jump. It took me less than 48 hours to get to LA, find a place and come home with the keys to our new castle and future. Angels above must have been guiding me to move back to the city of angels because it all came together too flawlessly.

I jumped, took a huge leap and landed on my feet back home in Southern California where I belong. Where we both belong.

Of course moving and setting up a brand new home from the ground up does take its toll on your routine. For me I slacked off a little on my clean eating. I was happy and I indulged in foods that normally would never cross my lips. My workout and running routine was compromised as well. I knew this, so I decided to do something about it sooner rather than later. I accidentally stumbled upon a Weight Watchers Group near where I am working. I went in, I joined, and I faced the scale and my inner insecure demons. Yes, I gained 13 lbs back but that is fine. I am now in control, and really looking forward to the next phase of my weight loss journey. I hope I can meet my goal with the help of Weight Watchers and  MelissaBenderfitness.  My leader Susan is absolutely fabulous,which makes all the difference in the world. The group is supportive, loving and most of all lighthearted and non judgemental. It was hard for me to admit that I slipped but I am human and flawed. With my humanity comes a strength that urges me to pick myself up and get right back to what makes me tick. My health, my writing, the charities I help along the way. I love this blog and I will continue on even as I take one step forward and two steps back. Eventually I will have to take another step and move forward or I may find myself stagnant and miserable. I will never give up.

So, today I weigh 13 lbs higher than my lowest weight I reached on my blog which was 165 lbs. It is day two of Weight Watchers and my new starting weight is 178 lbs.  I will be blogging all about my recipes, my weight loss and fitness, my goals,  and most important my new charities. I am in contact with a local well-known charity I admire and I will be posting about my nest ten pound charity event soon. In an essence I feel like today is my new day one, and back in Los Angeles where it all began.

I have never called myself an after, and I am forever a work in progress. Learning, evolving, and becoming the best me I can be; inside and out.

Namaste’ Love and Light

Rose

 

 

 

5 ways to survive a crisis

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“The best way out is always through”

Robert Frost

Life is beautiful, life is grand, and it is most definitely a privilege to be alive. Nothing is perfect though, and life is a series of hills and valleys. You definitely have to journey through the valleys before you are back on top of that metaphorical hill. I love that quote by Robert Frost, and I said it to myself daily for the last eight months. “The best way out is always through”

We all have our trials and tribulations, and each of our journeys are different. Our destinations may not be the same, but we are all connected through our shared humanity. For me I made sure I practiced a few steps to help me survive and not lose sight of my horizon, my goals and dreams. For me this made all the difference in the world. To be honest, I had a few meltdowns, I am human and with my humanity comes my flaws, scars and all. I make no apologies. It was through my meltdowns that I realized what I needed to do. The current was trying to bring me down, but I refused to drown and instead I chose to stay afloat and tread water until I saw the shore once again.

The dream is the bearer of a new possibility, the enlarged horizon of great hope. 

Howard Thurman

These are the steps that kept me sane and working towards my goals. Now that the murky water is clearing I can say I did not regress, I grew and I am in a better place than I once was last summer. I did not falter, I persevered. You can too. Keep your eye of that horizon and never give up. Hope is a beautiful state to dwell in. Love and light to all. Namaste’ Rose

 

  1. Assess your situation, breathe and take stock on what you need to do to make it better. A crisis can hit you hard and leave you feeling wounded and torn. Have your meltdowns, cry your tears but choose to live in hope instead of despair. After your initial fall stand back up, straighten your back and tell yourself I got this. Make a plan and take flight.birdie
  2. Do not stop working towards your goals and keep your exercise routine, trust me on this one.  I ran a 5K in October with my manager at work Josh, who inspires me. He has ran over 32 marathons and he actually started running because of a personal crisis he was experiencing. I met some amazing friends who have made an impact on my life running in that race, my inspiring friends Stan and John.  If you make plans, stand by your word and follow through. It is not easy but it is very rewarding. We are now planning another 5K in San Francisco on May 1st, and this time we are building a team of other co-workers who were inspired to join us. If I would have quit I would be starting all over now, and even more depressed because I let my crisis win.  I had to work a lot more hours than I would have liked, but I chose to walk on my breaks and take every opportunity to move as much as possible. I was averaging up to 25,000 a day. A motivating playlist made it fun. Start downloading music and get moving. Get high on those wonderful endorphins of yours. 27472617-2af2-40e7-adb0-7b717f69ec935k35k4
  3. Eat clean healthy food, drink a lot of fresh water and please rest your body and get out in nature.  Last thing you want is to do is gain weight and feel sluggish through your crisis. You need to feel healthy in mind and spirit to tackle the enormous task in front of you. Dealing with fears and the feeling of uncertainty is a lot worse when you are putting trash into your system, dehydrated and running on next to no sleep.  Would you litter? Pour oil into the ocean? Treat your body like you would the earth. Nurture it, water it, and let it grow. You need all the energy to get through this. A clean diet, lots of water and rest and recreation in the outdoors is the way to go. Like Nike tells the world, just do it.  I lost almost 15 lbs since the new year began. Below is my before and now.  2013, and 2016. Get outside and let the cool wind blow through your hair, it is the best therapy. We go to the coast to find our center, find your beach and breathe.pescadero212742839_1088819611163504_1748115292959977888_n
  4. Have a positive mantra. I have a few mantras that I said in my head over the last few months, and one my husband and I shared with each other daily. Of course I kept saying my favorite Robert Frost quote ” The best way out is always through” I also had a song that was my mantra, its a silly song but I love it. Remember the band Chumbawamba? They are a British alternative band most famous for their positive and uplifting song Tubthumping.  It’s title you will may not remember, but the lyrics will bring it all back. “I get knocked down, but I get up again, you’re never gonna keep me down.” I sang this song in my head, I ran to it, I listened to it during my commute. The last mantra my husband James started in the new year. He began each day with “Today is a good day” and ended it with ‘Today was a good day and tomorrow is a good day.” I am a firm believer in the law of attraction, and he attracted positive energy our way. He focused on the good even on the rough days. We are all magnets, so attract the positive into your life. Today is a good day. Say it, believe it to be true and it will be.12715355_10153861692433617_9154185607114484018_n
  5. Be extra kind to others, smile a little more, exude happiness, giving and love. This is so true, I went through my days being kind to strangers despite my despair and you know what, it helped me more than it could have helped others. I went to work happy and smiling when it was the last place I wished to be. If you are grumpy you will only attract that negativity back at you. I smiled more, shared more of myself, and I gave back a little more. I continued to volunteer and donate through my own personal struggles, and I met some awe inspiring people doing it. If you are kind and happy you will attract kindness and happiness. Such a simple step to the path of happiness and to help you bear your crisis with a little more grace. Be a Susie Sunshine even if you are surrounded by Debbie Downers. You may find your uplifting attitude changes those around you. “You must be the change you wish to see in the world. Gandhi charity

 

 

 

LEVELS OF LOW

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Humility, that low, sweet root, from which all heavenly virtues shoot.

Thomas Moore

 

I used to think I was too lucky to be so happy-go-lucky.  I would wake up happy for no reason. Nothing would get me down. I was just happy to wake up, grateful for my morning breath as well as my morning cup of steaming coffee. I could say I am an optimist, but let’s be honest here. I am a part-time optimist when things are going in my favor. It is easy to be breezy when life is going well with no complications. Part of my happiness has been haunted by this little apparition standing behind me taunting me with what if’s. It is one of the reasons I avoid trips to the doctor. What if the rug is pulled out under my feet? What if this natural state of euphoria I live in is a hoax or a false reality? What if something happens to test how optimistic I really am? What if I am just a walking, talking fraud? What if?

I have been in a crisis for quite some time now. My crisis came to a crescendo when I stopped working on my goals. I just stopped in November. I stopped working out, I stopped running, I stopped eating healthy and I stopped hoping.  The stress was manageable until I stopped being me and working on everything I had been so proud of for the last few years. Stress and his sidekick anxiety grabbed me by the lapel, shook me until I was left humbled and left me with bigger problems to face. Weight gain, depression, anxiety. It is easy to indulge your inner pessimist and wallow in your woes when you surrender way too easily. The hard part is fighting back.  The biggest challenge is to kick depression and anxiety to the curb, escape their dark clutches and find your way back into the sunlight. That is where it is warm, that is where you can reboot and find the answers you seek. Hope is seen in the refection of the sunlight dancing off the pavement. Go there and try to hear the music.

I stayed home tonight to deal with some pressing personal issues, and I realized even though I am not yet doing what I love full-time, doing a job that is a means to an end is a gift and definitely not a given. I am blessed to work in a place that is lively, where the people are kind and sincere and genuinely care about each other. Staying away does not help my cause, it just hinders it. I need to face that music I spoke of, fight back my demons and be grateful for every light filled opportunity I have to better our lives. We all have a little meek in us, as well as a little mighty.  Here I am, a new published author and a waitress, both are equally important to me.

We are human, and we all face certain hardships from time to time. There is dirt below our toes that keeps us literally down to earth. I realized this as I was watching the news, and seeing people in crises far worse than my own and I felt shamed. Young and old battling diseases and health problems, tornadoes, tragic accidents. It is an old cliché’ but it could be worse. There are levels of lows, and barometers of strength.

I have been up and down, and with a new dawn and a new year approaching I am going to find my way back up to the top of the cliff. That is where I can feel closest to the sun. If you need me in 2016 I will be basking in the promise of tomorrow with my brand new sun-kissed outlook. Back to my working out and all of the goals that I chose to chase when I began this blog. I look forward to getting high on endorphins and on life.

I am a work in progress but the sun will rise tomorrow, and it gives each and every one of us another chance to start over. I will rise up with the sun and take each and every new beginning that comes my way. I may not be perfect, but I am breathing; there is coffee brewing and all is well with the world.

With love and light

Rose