Category Archives: in a crisis

WEIGH IN MONDAY

Happy Monday to all? Today is weigh in Monday and I lost 2 lbs, cue happy dance. That brings me to 182 lbs. I’m down 7.6 lbs. I’m keeping a journal of my meals and calories on the Loseitapp and I’m using Dr Greger’s Daily Dozen App to keep track of my vegan nutrition. I’m doing this six days a week and one day a week I allow a vegan cheat day. On that day I eat whatever vegan foods I like, but I do my best to keep my calories in check. 

Losing weight through stress or when you are in a personal crisis is not easy. For me what’s working this second try around is I’m focusing on my nutrition and my fitness. My meal plan six days a week is very clean, with very low salt, no oils and just a bit of raw sugar in my coffee. Using both apps keeps me accountable. My energy is definitely up since I started the Dr Greger Daily Dozen. My one vegan cheat day a week allows me to eat the vegan foods I love. This week I’m choosing that day to be Halloween.

Another bonus is how incredibly inexpensive this way of eating is. Lentils, tofu, split peas, canned beans no salt, fresh and frozen fruits and vegetables, quinoa, Ezekiel bread, oats, flax seeds, no salt peanuts and no salt peanut butter. It’s not always easy to tick off everybox, yesterday  I missed cruciferous vegetables; but that’s ok. I strive to each day do better. 

I am also working on some new and exciting projects, I also plan to waitress more than usual, and I’m continuing forward with this blog with the intent to post more regularly and I plan more videos in YouTube.

Dr Greger recommends exercise daily and I may start my workouts in the evening on my work days to be able to manage everything I’m working on. I bought an amazing planner from Barnes and Noble to keep everything organized.

It is all about a positive mindset. Stress gets me, and sometimes I feel like I’m drowning in it; than I remember I’m a good swimmer. Right now im treading water through my struggles and my eye is on my health, fitness, strength, flexibility, and longevity. I’m proud to be a plant eater. 

Stay tuned for next post when I announce how I’m doing my small part to help others in the community I live in with the wonderful people I work with.

When you find yourself struggling, it helps to help others.

Namaste’

Rose

WEIGHT LOSS THROUGH STRESS

Happy Friday to all. I’m doing a lot of soul searching and thinking this week. If you know me, I’m a firm believer of the law of attraction. This week seemed to spiral in the negative direction. Once we started to focus on something that happened early in the week everything just seemed to go downward. It’s like they say, if you wake up and stub your toe and believe it will be a bad day it will. You are what you believe. I’m trying to change that. Fall nine times, get up ten. 

Time to make like a GPS and yell recalculating as loud as I can. One thing that has been positive is I’ve stayed true to my word to blog and to stick to my weight loss and health regimen. I lost 5 lbs my first week and I’m very dedicated. I’m working out again. I’m taking my frustrations out on the treadmill.No matter what happens I’m not giving up. Goal or bust. 

We can’t change the outcome of certain circumstances but we can change our thought process. We even may find some clarity to take necessary risks with our future. Sometimes you have to just jump and see where you land.

Breathe in, breathe out 

love and light

Namaste’

Rose 

 

WEIGH IN WEDNESDAY

Weigh in day came early. I admit it I was impatient to get on the scale, technically I weighed in one week ago today, but I started posting on my blog regularly a day or two later. For now Wednesday will be weigh in Wednesday. 

Through a very stressful week after getting back into town I lost five pounds. I know my clean eating Whole Foods plant-based is working. I admit it’s a challenge to change your mindset on oils and salt, but oils and salt are only going to be occasionally treats for me along with the rare occasional vegan junk food.

It’s been forever since I’ve seen the numbers move on the scale. I’m committed to staying the course through my overwhelming challenges and a bit of temporary depression. Soon I will be updating workouts and cardio. As someone who has been described as dangerously optimistic and eternally happy I’ve discovered I too am human and can have sad moments in my life.

The journey the second time around is so much harder. I’m not giving up no matter what obstacles come my way. Ever heard of dodgeball? I’m dodging every single thing that attempts to tempt me to falter. I’m going to be a weight loss success story. I will get my eternal happiness back, it’s just taking a bit of hard work this time.

Namaste

love and light

Rose

TOMORROW IS NOT PROMISED

Our cat Max was sleeping in his cat bed today, we call it his baby bed. We bought his bed for him months ago after we adopted him. It was a month after we lost our beloved Siamese cat Rascal when we saw an advertisement that someone was giving their Siamese cat away. We were not looking to replace Rascal, but I felt compelled to adopt this particular cat.  He was declawed on all four legs and something told me he needed us as we needed him.

Max has been a healing force in our lives and a friend to our other Siamese Spanky who was severely depressed when Rascal passed. Seeing him so happy and relaxed in his  baby bed made me so happy. It is such a little thing but probably at the same time a very profound moment. I am happiest in the simplest of moments and despite the sadness and challenges of life these moments sustain me to go on no matter what. Through the sorrows, the failures, the challenges, the loneliness for friends and family we miss; these moments sustain our happiness.

Speaking of ‘no matter what’ we got the tragic news today about the passing of my hubby’s aunt Jan. We are deeply saddened for his Mother, his uncle Keith and the children and grandchildren. Life is so precious and limited. I cannot wrap my head around loss, I can only go on the best that I can sharing love to all those closest to me and trying to make a little difference in this strange experience we call life.

I will eat clean today, and continue on with my goals despite emotions and sorrow.I am not giving up nor am I using bad news to go on an eating free for all.  Losing a loved one is a reminder to go forth with as much vigor as I can muster because life is about now. Today is now, tomorrow never shows up; it just keeps getting pushed into the mysterious void of the future. I cannot touch tomorrow, but I can feel the warmth as I sit here on my patio listening to the waterfall beneath me. The clouds here in Texas feel so close I can almost touch them. The clouds feel less elusive than tomorrowland. 

I understand for many going forward is not as easy, those who suffer from mental illness and depression. Many cannot bounce back as easy and many do not share how they really feel. Someone you may believe is a survivor and strong may be faltering. Reach out to those you know are going through challenges, you never may know how truly needed it really is.  Like everyone on social media I was shocked to hear about Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. Someone may seem to have it all and inside they are unraveling.  Just reach out and be there, and someday someone will do the same for you. 

Love and light to all, love and light.

Call 1800-273-8255

 

http://suicidehotlines.com/national.html

 

 

 

 

STARTING OVER

Happy Thursday and happy health to all.

I had an epiphany yesterday. I have been held back by my ego, my vision and memories of all my weight loss success I had on this blog. I was really doing it, than life literally kicked me in the caboose.

To move forward I have to realize it is for my health and fitness, and accept I slipped. I need to quit focusing on my appearance and do it because it is what I love and the end reward is health. Of course looking great is a bonus but I am not going to put the emphasis on my appearance. Looking at photos from one year ago just makes me sad and stagnate. I finally had my husband James take new before photos and I plan to really get to work on my fitness. These are the only before photos I will take for three months. 

It has been a year and I gained thirty of the sixty pounds I lost. I also lost my fit body because honestly I have not lifted a weight in a year and my cardio sessions have not been consistent. I own it all and now I am starting completely brand new. This blog is now my new journey with my starting weight of 188 lbs.

We got some bad news the past week,more than one bout with bad news. That’s the thing about bad news when it is about other people than yourself, you have to keep it private even on a public forum as a blog. So not only am I starting over, I am starting over after life decided to kick but again. It is ok, kick me down and I will stand back up. 

My tools for working out this time around are simple. Melissa Bender Fitness, my hubby James who works out daily, and the gym and pool where I live. Everything else is up to me this time around. Making it happen this time after all of the challenges is going to mean so much more. I am not yet on hypothyroidism meds and I am trying to tackle this without it for now.

Here are the photos, no more shame. I own this and will succeed round two. I admit looking at these brings tears to my eyes. That is motivation enough to push hard. Thank you to all for the support and I hope I can start losing weight again and help some charities along the way. Love, light and truth. 

TYING THE STRINGS BACK TOGETHER

If you follow me you know since April my the strings in life started to unravel. I was able to have much weight loss success despite personal struggles because I was in control of the struggles in my life. I couldn’t control what was to come. My Mother passed away and my husband James took a position in Houston Texas and soon we left West Hollywood for Houston. It was our third move since 2014 and a big one at that. The summer for me was healing and not much else. I somewhat lost what I was working on as I tried to heal myself from the inside out. I also became vegan which was a transition for me. I since decided for now I will be vegetarian.

Today is the Autumn Equinox and day one of the second chapter of my weight loss blog, my official restart and my weigh in. I am not looking back now, I am only looking forward. For the relaunch of this blog my focus will be on health, wellness, fitness and goals. I still plan to sponsor a charity with each ten pounds I lose but I also will make a list of goals for each month beginning in October. There is going to be a give-a-way on my Facebook page, and I also promise to commit to posting if not every day every other day.

I am all in again, like I was in 2013 when I began this blog. I will not let WordPress struggles or life get in my way. I will be here and present even when things are not going my way. I will be raw, honest and forthright. I am putting all of myself out there beginning with my first weigh in today. I went from 159 to 179 in 5 months but that is ok, I got this and there is no shame in my game. 

I am human, I am me and today I am moving forward. Fall nine times, get up ten.

 

I GOT A NEW ATTITUDE

If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.

Maya Angelou

That quote sums up what I need to do since I moved from my beloved West Hollywood CA to Houston, Texas. It’s time to make radical changes in my thoughts and attitude. I am starting over fresh, in this blog and my goals; to commit to posting at least every other day and to start over in my weight loss/fitness journey. As soon as I settle in I will be looking for new charities to help again. No more complaining I miss California, as I plan to embrace all of the positives of where I am living at the moment. I have landed in Texas, but I plan to take off in my goals and dreams. This is a gift of a new beginning. There is beauty when you open your eyes and look for beauty.

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Since 2014, We moved from LA to San Francisco, from San Francisco to LA, and recently from LA to Houston. That is one move a year. My husband James was unemployed for over a year and my Mother passed away recently. Sometimes I am surprised we are both still standing. That was a lot of changes and a lot of new beginnings, but each new beginning is just that; a new beginning. Life happens, we adjust, we falter; and we finally pick up the broken pieces and put them back together again. We figure it out. I am doing that now, I am figuring it out.

For the first time since I began this blog I gained weight. It started with 6 lbs and went up to 13 lbs. I realized I needed to go back to #weightwatchersonline before it was too late. It’s been one week and tomorrow is my first weigh in day. Starting over again at 173 lbs. I went from 159 lbs up to 173 lbs but now the scale will be moving in my favor again. The goal is to treat this blog as brand new, with new excitement and ideas. 

Today I met with a friend I know from The Richard Simmons community who also happens to be an author. It was an inspirational lunch, and I got my copy of her book signed. She even brought me a copy of her children’s book that just came out. Her first book, An Exodus From Obesity is filled with so much insight from someone who lost a lot of weight. Wisdom, inspiration and life’s lessons. I also picked up a copy of The Alchemist. Everyone who read it said it was life changing literature. It is just what I need for my new tomorrow.

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To Tomorrow, and new beginnings and life’s changes. Out with the old and in with the new.

Namaste’

Rose

WEIGHT LOSS AFTER LOSS

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Losing a loved one knocks you down,and then you get back up and the memories knock you over again. It is a never-ending cycle, this grief stuff. I guess I just need to navigate my way around the emotional grenades and go on, and we must go on. 

Losing weight after losing a loved one, this is what is on my mind at the moment. Nothing knocked me down, nothing until I lost my Mother. I made it to my lowest weight on this journey, 159 lbs and I did it through a move from LA to San Francisco, my husband’s job loss and a move back to LA. I kept going through all of those life changes, and life did not break me and I never gained a pound. I kept losing and I am proud to say I did it, until the last month.

Now life after losing my Mother left me with a few pounds of extra weight. I admit I fell of the wagon. That’s the thing about wagons, they keep going, you just have to catch up and jump back on. I am committing to my healthy lifestyle and workouts and goals, it is not easy now. Our new kitchen is barely set up but I can do this. It starts today, I know how to do this and I know how to get to where I am going. I am back on the wagon and on the road to all of my goals. I will lose the 10 lbs I gained and get to my goals.

I am about to run to the grocery store, my hubby James is working and we need something healthy to eat. I am going to wear my runners belt and run there even with this heat and humidity. I plan on making a schedule soon, and tomorrow I have an interview to work in a local restaurant for some extra cash for my goals and our new life. I will post my workout/running/yoga schedule once I begin my job and new routine. No more slacking off. 

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I would love to know how you kept working towards your goals through a life crisis. What tips do you follow to keep at it? We are all here to inspire each other.

So much love and Light

Rose

I FINALLY WEIGHED IN, (here is what happened)

 

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I like to consider myself unique. I believe in nature vs nurture. I believe my soul comes from somewhere else and this body is just the shell in which I walk my days. Or so I convinced myself.

And then there is home and you. Not the California home I claim as my own, but the city where you raised us. Cleveland, Ohio and a magical childhood despite the struggles, but isn’t life a magical trip? The hardest part of it all is loss. Coming home is truly bittersweet, full of celebration tainted with the sour taste of regret.

My first love, I have been your reluctant twin, believing I am an original when in reality I am just a carbon copy of you. Different but so much the same. You were beauty and fire married with humor and light. I am just the prism reflecting your existence.

I cry uncle, I cry when I don’t want to cry, I cry wolf. I cry.

Birdsong reminds me there is yet another plane to catch, the one thing I should have done long ago. I like to believe you will be flying on the wings of my plane. Drinking Dewars and soda with a Jane Austen novel
In hand; cussing at the flight attendants and causing a beautiful raucous.

In memory of my best friend, My Mother

 Shirley Bruno.

These are the times that try men’s souls.

        Thomas Paine

That quote really speaks to me, ever since we left Los Angeles for San Francisco in the autumn of 2014 my life has been a roller coaster. So many twists and turns that I am surprised I am still standing. After the move to San Francisco my husband James was laid off, a sudden move back to LA, my Mother passing away and another move to Houston would have broken the strongest person indeed. But here I am, sitting in Houston, Texas drinking water and Starbucks in the public lounge of my apartment building and I lived through it all. Here I am, a little worse for wear; with a damn cold and a damaged soul. As soon as my body heals ( my heart will take more time), I plan to get back into my workout and running routine. I plan to jump back into my goals even though I feel at times there is a brick sitting on my chest. Losing a parent is no joke, it is like there is life before the loss and life after. I often wonder if I will return to my jovial self, I often wonder how do people heal from such a tremendous loss. Through it all I made my lowest weight, 159 lbs, and after my Mother passed away I gained 7 lbs which brings me back up to 166 lbs. Time to get back to work. My Mother passing was the only time I fell off the diet wagon, it was the only time I slipped up and gained weight.

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I just returned from my first trip home to Cleveland, Ohio in years. I went for my Mother’s Memorial party and I was reunited with family and my hometown friends. I ain’t gonna lie, this weight loss blogger was not thinking about my healthy diet for the last few months. In Cleveland I think I was on the hometown food tour. My Mother’s Memorial party was a beautiful tribute to everything she was about. My sister Frankie, and her friends Shar and April pulled it off like pro’s and my sister Gina and Rosita out did themselves on the sauce, meatballs, pork and spaghetti. It was wonderful seeing my sisters, my nieces,and my childhood friends and I hope to see them more often. My original girls, my sisters, my loves. Frankie, Dona, Gina, and me. The girls I look up too, all four of them. Each one inspires me to be better and do better just like Mom did.

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So here I am again, navigating yet another home. I have so many goals, and accomplishments I am most proud of to date. I will jump back in and get to work. The first step was stepping on the scale, and I am happy that the damage was not too extreme. Time to begin anew in a brand new city. To be strong and emulate the strongest female I have ever knew, my Mother.

 

END OF A CRISIS

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Good afternoon to all, I am still on west coast time, but I am adjusting. For those of you who follow my Facebook page you know my husband James and I just made the trek from Los Angeles to Houston, Texas. This was not an east decision, but we both decided the opportunity for his career was too good to pass up. Here I am again in yet another transition, and this one was particularly tough because as we were moving my Mother passed away.  A lot to deal with in such a short time. For us, ever since we left Los Angeles in 2014 for San Francisco everything has been a bit more challenging, but we got through our crisis. The hardest thing we faced was a sudden loss of a loved one, it is one of those things you feel you may never recover from. Below is a story about my Mother Shirley, she was truly a beautiful soul and unique character. She is the love of my life.

http://lebomag.com/what-my-mother-gave-me/

I have learned many lessons about life and loss, and how time is so precious. I promise to see all family, both of our families from here on out. My fear of flying I will deal with, there are loved ones to see. I fly home Friday for a memorial dinner in honor of my Mother.

I also wish my dear Mother in Law Julie a very Happy Birthday. I have the best in-laws and I cannot wait to see them soon, even if it means bringing them to us in Texas. As I work on my goals and plans it is so very important to spend time with loved ones, family and friends. I will keep in touch better going forward. 

In the time since 2014, no matter how challenging things got, I never gained a pound. I stayed on my goals and accomplished a lot of new goals with my writing and my weight loss and fitness goals. I was on it, until the last few weeks. I fell off program for a few weeks, and life and loss showed me how incredibly human I am. I know I have put on a few pounds, and as soon as the movers arrive with our stuff and my scale I will post exactly how much weight I have gained. My blankets I collected are being delivered at the end of June. I plan on looking for more charities to assist in my new home.

So here I am,  A die-hard Californian in Texas and embarking on day one today. No more treating my body like it is a trash can, back to honoring this body as the temple it is. It is the home where my soul dwells and I will treat it with the respect it deserves.

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I will keep this short and sweet, as I begin anew in another new home. I can say today I have met two new friends, and learned a lot about my new community. I plan on posting what I plan to do as I move forward, including diet and my benderfitness workouts. I also plan on starting a Youtube channel as I work towards my goals in my new home. I am very proud to say I finally got my book Camellia in Snow into the famous Book Soup on the iconic Sunset Strip, so LA I will be returning. This was a goosebumps moment indeed.

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For now, hello Texas I embrace you with an open heart and open mind. Thank you for this chance to begin anew. I found my first Texas tree, and how unique is it? It looks like an open hand reaching out for the heavens. I plan on treating my life with the same reverence, and making it my mission to help people more than ever.18838877_10155246030878617_1431367025370470149_n