Author Archives: mychangeforaten

About mychangeforaten

I AM.... I am... a poet, deep and philosophical; I am...a dancer, lyrical and graceful; I am...an artist, creative and colorful; I am... a yogi, mindful and peaceful; I am... a woman, sensual and feminine; I am... A humanitarian,humble and giving; I am... A survivor,wounded and strong; I am human... I am me. I moved to the city of angels from my beloved big apple with my husband and two beloved cats and now fate has placed me in San Francisco. I am in love with life and all creatures of the universe. Namaste' love and light.

TOMORROW IS NOT PROMISED

Our cat Max was sleeping in his cat bed today, we call it his baby bed. We bought his bed for him months ago after we adopted him. It was a month after we lost our beloved Siamese cat Rascal when we saw an advertisement that someone was giving their Siamese cat away. We were not looking to replace Rascal, but I felt compelled to adopt this particular cat.  He was declawed on all four legs and something told me he needed us as we needed him.

Max has been a healing force in our lives and a friend to our other Siamese Spanky who was severely depressed when Rascal passed. Seeing him so happy and relaxed in his  baby bed made me so happy. It is such a little thing but probably at the same time a very profound moment. I am happiest in the simplest of moments and despite the sadness and challenges of life these moments sustain me to go on no matter what. Through the sorrows, the failures, the challenges, the loneliness for friends and family we miss; these moments sustain our happiness.

Speaking of ‘no matter what’ we got the tragic news today about the passing of my hubby’s aunt Jan. We are deeply saddened for his Mother, his uncle Keith and the children and grandchildren. Life is so precious and limited. I cannot wrap my head around loss, I can only go on the best that I can sharing love to all those closest to me and trying to make a little difference in this strange experience we call life.

I will eat clean today, and continue on with my goals despite emotions and sorrow.I am not giving up nor am I using bad news to go on an eating free for all.  Losing a loved one is a reminder to go forth with as much vigor as I can muster because life is about now. Today is now, tomorrow never shows up; it just keeps getting pushed into the mysterious void of the future. I cannot touch tomorrow, but I can feel the warmth as I sit here on my patio listening to the waterfall beneath me. The clouds here in Texas feel so close I can almost touch them. The clouds feel less elusive than tomorrowland. 

I understand for many going forward is not as easy, those who suffer from mental illness and depression. Many cannot bounce back as easy and many do not share how they really feel. Someone you may believe is a survivor and strong may be faltering. Reach out to those you know are going through challenges, you never may know how truly needed it really is.  Like everyone on social media I was shocked to hear about Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. Someone may seem to have it all and inside they are unraveling.  Just reach out and be there, and someday someone will do the same for you. 

Love and light to all, love and light.

Call 1800-273-8255

 

http://suicidehotlines.com/national.html

 

 

 

 

STARTING OVER

Happy Thursday and happy health to all.

I had an epiphany yesterday. I have been held back by my ego, my vision and memories of all my weight loss success I had on this blog. I was really doing it, than life literally kicked me in the caboose.

To move forward I have to realize it is for my health and fitness, and accept I slipped. I need to quit focusing on my appearance and do it because it is what I love and the end reward is health. Of course looking great is a bonus but I am not going to put the emphasis on my appearance. Looking at photos from one year ago just makes me sad and stagnate. I finally had my husband James take new before photos and I plan to really get to work on my fitness. These are the only before photos I will take for three months. 

It has been a year and I gained thirty of the sixty pounds I lost. I also lost my fit body because honestly I have not lifted a weight in a year and my cardio sessions have not been consistent. I own it all and now I am starting completely brand new. This blog is now my new journey with my starting weight of 188 lbs.

We got some bad news the past week,more than one bout with bad news. That’s the thing about bad news when it is about other people than yourself, you have to keep it private even on a public forum as a blog. So not only am I starting over, I am starting over after life decided to kick but again. It is ok, kick me down and I will stand back up. 

My tools for working out this time around are simple. Melissa Bender Fitness, my hubby James who works out daily, and the gym and pool where I live. Everything else is up to me this time around. Making it happen this time after all of the challenges is going to mean so much more. I am not yet on hypothyroidism meds and I am trying to tackle this without it for now.

Here are the photos, no more shame. I own this and will succeed round two. I admit looking at these brings tears to my eyes. That is motivation enough to push hard. Thank you to all for the support and I hope I can start losing weight again and help some charities along the way. Love, light and truth. 

PERFECT TIMING

Sudden changes are just adventures we didn’t write on our bucket lists.

Rose Bruno Bailey

Perfect timing, In the past I had a habit of putting off things I really wanted to do, because I felt the timing was off. You decide to start a fitness/weight loss journey and life takes an unexpected detour. What do you do? Do you decide to continue on and work on your goals during your personal crisis or do you wait for a better time?  

The thing with time is, we all think we have all of this extra time. Are we chasing time or is time chasing us? So life has a way of grabbing you by the neck and choking you until you feel like you cannot breathe. I have been there, everyone has been there. At the same time life can be the most exhilarating experience.

Don’t wait to start your healthy lifestyle. Time will pass anyway, and your crisis will also pass. I am sure you will feel a lot better when your crisis is over and you are healthy and fit vs possibly creating a health crisis because of the poor habits you followed when everything was not going your way. You do not need to create another crisis, one at a time is enough. Some things in life we can control. I feel exercise and eating healthy keeps me healthy and in control. Today is my day three and I weigh in next Wednesday. Weigh in Wednesday is my day I am accountable for my weekly actions. No matter what life brings at me, I will be losing weight again.

I have a dear friend in Texas, she is actually my lifeline here. We met when my hubby James and I were Ubering home from the vet with our cat Rascal; she was our driver. We had just received bad news. I ended up exchanging information with her and we became fast friends. We are both Author’s and we cheer each other on. For me living in Texas she is a game changer. Sometimes something wonderful happens even in our darkest moments. Perfect timing on a not so perfect day. The sun will rise,it always does. Follow the glimmer of light and don’t ever give up on yourself. 

Love and Light

Rose

 

EMOTIONAL EATING

Hello to all. On this Wednesday I send everyone a big midweek hug. If you are starting a weight loss/fitness/health journey, congratulations. Just remember, you are beautiful now as you strive to become healthier you. Age, weight doesn’t matter. You got this.

Today I wanted to cover the topic of emotional eating. I really slayed every life problem and kept losing until I lost my Mother and our beloved cat Rascal. Everyone has a breaking point. That was mine, and I gained half of my weight back. No shame in my gain, I have faced it and now I am on the path to fitness and health; round two. I will be sharing my fitness and food plans in future posts, and a new before photo. I remember the first time in 2013 when I began my first weight loss journey, taking the before photo was liberating.

Left 2013, right 2017. I will be back to where I was on the right. New photos soon.

I hope to feel that empowerment again this time, and the happiness when I start to change my physical body for the better. I am all about mind and body so working on my mind is a major part of the equation. 

Back to emotional eating. You get into your healthy lifestyle and you get bad news. Life has struggles, the yin and yang. You hear of someone who is ill, your job is having stresses, physically maybe you are under the weather. The struggles can be massive or they can be little but there is no doubt struggles can put a strain on your willpower.

My advice is to keep going, eat your healthy food and do not give in. If you must eat something off program portion it out and work it into your calories for the day. Balance is key. I use the Loseitapp. It is free and I can keep my food diary to see how I am doing. I started it yesterday and I am tracking everything, including my water. It helps me stay the course. Don’t forget to get moving too, nothing helps you deal with the little nuances of life like exercise. I call it Mobile Meditation.

Track so you do not binge. If you bite it, write it. If you snack it, track it. I know some people do not like to keep a food diary and that is ok to. Everyone is different and everyone knows what works for them. For me it helps me be accountable. Whether you like to track or not, I bet you never felt good or empowered after a binge. Why do we abuse our bodies like that? 

Weight loss, like any thing we dedicate ourselves to, is a mindset. Today is my day two. I am so happy to be here and have the opportunity to find my healthy self again. Don’t you love second chances?

Happy Wednesday

Love, light, and healing for those who need it

Rose

WEIGHT LOSS JOURNEY 2.0

Happy Tuesday to all. Today officially begins the second round of my weight loss journey and this blog. It is a brand new beginning. I am not looking back, I am looking forward. There are a lot of thoughts that occupy my mind but I refuse to let the negative ones take up my precious mental space. One thought that comes to mind is that blogging has changed so much since I began in 2013. Everyone seems to have professional blogs and sometimes I feel like my little weight loss blog doesn’t seem to fit anymore. I do not have professional equipment, heck I need a new computer and a new phone. When I began in 2013 I didn’t even have a cell phone. That didn’t work out for me so I decided to venture into the modern world and I have not looked back. I have noticed a lot of blogs and their Instagram pages seem to also have professional photos. So, what am I to do, wait until I have all of these material items or like my Mom would say, “suck it up kid and just do it.”

No negative thoughts, this is my blog and my journey and I do not like to put things off. Life is too short. So Here I am, day one with a lot of blessings that I have to be able to begin a brand new healthy lifestyle. Instead of looking at the negative reasons I do not fit, I am listing the things I am grateful for. These things help me as I begin my healthy lifestyle again. Weight loss journey 2.0

  1. I learned so much the first time around, my best friend is fitness blogger and I can do her workouts at home anytime. Check her out at www.benderfitness.com
  2. I know my body, and what it needs. I simply stopped doing it, but I know the ins and outs of nutrition and how to live a healthy lifestyle. I live a plant-based lifestyle and I really have learned in the past to treat my body like a temple and not a trash can. I am just relearning my former healthy habits.
  3. I may not have all the fancy equipment, but I do have a phone, a computer; and I live in an apartment community that has a two level gym, a pool and a jacuzzi, a computer room among other amenities. I can utilize these gifts for my blogging experience. I also live in an area that is amazing to run in. The weather is mostly warm and I should have no excuses going forward. Gratitude before grumpy excuses.
  4. Plant based and transitioning to Veganism in Houston sounds crazy, and in a way it is. HEB is the best grocery store with so many healthy options. I cannot say how happily surprised I am with their selection for so many types of healthy lifestyles. Vegan in Texas?  Heck yeah, with the help of HEB. 
  5. My husband James. Having someone on board is huge. He is really into working out and cardio, and is open-minded to transitioning to a plant-based diet. He walks the walk, and we work out together. He even paid for me to get my group exercise instructor Certification with The American Council of Exercise. I passed my CPR and my exam is on August 27th. I am so grateful to be married to my best friend and that we mirror each other’s stride.

So, excuses be damned. I am in it to win it, and my prize is a healthier me. Day one done and done. Here we go!!

Love and Light

WEIGH IN DAY

Happy Memorial Day Weekend to all. Thank you to the men and women who have kept us safe through the years. We remember those who have sacrificed their lives for our freedom. 

I work tonight, but I am off tomorrow. I am enjoying the weekend when I am not working with my husband James, and we are having what he calls summer fun food. I eat plant based so for me that means vegan hot dogs. It is not exactly a healthy weekend though, I do indulge in buns with my vegan hot dogs. I love our time together.

After having bronchitis I am ready to resume my workout schedule, so I decided Tuesday is the perfect day to jump back into my healthy lifestyle and routine. I did weigh in today and I am starting this weight loss journey at 187 lbs. Soon I will be visiting the Dr and seeing about Thyroid medication. I have done the hard work before, and I always felt wonderful so I am ready to begin again. I will share everything I am doing to lose weight again, and resume the wellness lifestyle that is the best fit for me. I am the creator of my life. 

For today, there is work and a holiday tomorrow. See you Tuesday when I begin to live my best life. Past weight loss or gains don’t matter to me. I am only traveling forward.

Happy Memorial Day

Love and light

Rose 

NEW BEGINNINGS

Happy Saturday to all. It took me a while to get here, exactly one year. I have put all the hardships and struggles behind me and I am focusing on the present and future. I was a little less than eager to start blogging again, I needed to find my way back naturally so when I did start blogging everything I shared would be truly authentic. I am at that place now. Here I am on my lovely balcony, listening to the fountain below and ready for new beginnings.

This is my weight loss blog, if you follow me you know I help a charity with each ten pounds. If you follow me on Facebook and Instagram you also know I had success at weight loss, helped several charities and lost sixty pounds. You probably are also aware after moving from Los Angeles to Texas I put on twenty-five pounds. I stopped blogging when the scale stopped moving. I got so frustrated I felt like I had nothing to say. Recently I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism and with that diagnosis came my aha moment. Everything made sense. I worked so hard and the scale didn’t reflect my hard work. Soon I will be starting medication and sharing that aspect of my journey.

This blog going forward is still going to be my weight loss journey, but so much more. I would like to put myself in the wellness/lifestyle blogger category. I plan to continue my weight loss struggle and journey, but also incorporate many subjects that inspire me to live my dream life. Nothing will be off-limits but negativity. I will share my struggles but my voice will be positive and inspirational, as I gain inspiration from my mentors, readers, friends, family and the people I cross paths with. I have often said there is inspiration everywhere and I believe that. I also have plans to update this website to be more user-friendly and start a YouTube channel when I am able to purchase equipment to do so. For now,here I am with no thrills, beginning again. 

Summer has arrived, and I started this blog exactly 5 years ago in July. I cannot think of a better time to reinvent my blog and rekindle my healthy lifestyle and help others along the way.  I’ve missed you.

Love and Light

Rose Bruno Bailey

FAILURE IS NOT MY FINAL DESTINATION

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.

Winston Churchill

Dreams, we all have them. It’s one of the things that motivates us to move forward in life. Dreaming feels like stepping through muddy moments and coming out refreshed on the other side, where the sun shines in a bright blue sky and rain comes down like a warm release of cleansing water. Dreams, I live for my dreams and passions and I have many dreams.

This blog was one of my dreams. It began with an idea. That’s the thing with dreams, at first they are just ideas. Our imagination concocts these thoughts called ideas, and it is up to us to either ignore them or find ways to turn thoughts into ideas and then into dreams. Sounds magical I know, and it is. I remember when my best friend suggested I write poems. Her suggestion was a thought, her thought became an idea and when she conveyed it to me it became my thoughts and ideas; and finally one of my dreams. I started writing, first with poems and later memoirs and essays. I am far from done and grateful to Melissa for her amazing idea that changed my life and my direction in which I live it.

The idea for this blog became a dream of mine. To lose weight while helping charities. It became one of my passions in my life and took me to places I had no idea I would even think of going. I had success, I lost 60 lbs and helped a lot of charities, and I was introduced to the world of fitness for the first time since my dancing days. This blog sprouted ideas that I continue to work on. I am so proud of the work I do. One of my largest dreams is to one day after I reach my goal to become a motivational speaker, helping others achieve weight loss and confidence, and encouraging them to pay it forward and help others all while achieving their own personal goals.

That same sky that brought the sunshine and the cleansing rain fell right through, more than once. In the same six months I went from achieving my lowest weight on this blog to gaining 30 lbs back six months later. I experienced the loss of my Mom, a move from LA to Houston and the sickness and loss of our beloved Siamese Rascal. I discovered I  sometimes can be an emotional eater. I did all of those things I thought were behind me, I ate unhealthy food and stopped exercising. Stress took over my life, especially during the three months I tried to save Rascal. The overeating, the lack of exercise, the stress and the grief taught me a valuable lesson. We are all human, we will fall from time to time. Our failures and falls do not define us. Our humanity and connection to each other defines us. Love defines us. What I did to try to save Rascal was love.

So back to dreams. How does one dream of doing something when they worked so hard to get to their goals and they failed? How can you continue if you failed? Where do you go from here? How do you start over? Can I ever make that dream of helping others lose weight after I myself had a setback? Am I not worthy? 

The answer is we are not defined by our failures and our setbacks, but how we stand back up; scraped knees, bruised egos and all. Facing our failure but putting it behind us as we admit we need to make a change and move forward. The key to change is facing you fell, forgiving yourself for faltering and admitting it happened. Connecting to others helps in the process, no man is an island. Connecting to other people was a huge part of my beginning of this blog and I will continue to connect and not try to go it alone. We are all connected.

I am back to blogging, back to losing weight ( with more to lose after my 30 lb weight gain), back to helping charities and working on my fitness goals; back after heartbreak and the business of being human. 

I fell hard, but I stand up again. I am alive, the sun rose today and I couldn’t think of a better way of honoring life by taking the universe up of the gift of another chance to dream and to do what I love; turning magical thoughts into inspirational ideas and dream, dream and do.

Nice to see you again,

Namaste’

Rose

WEIGH IN

Today was my weigh in, and I am happy to say I lost 5 lbs. I stayed on track, ate mostly clean and I kept my calories between 1,200 and 1,400. It was a challenging week due to the fact my cat Rascal was hospitalized and it’s the Christmas Season.

It seems everywhere I go holiday goodies vie for my attention but I bought no calorie holiday beverages to make me feel like I too can be festive. I’m trying to find joy despite caring for a very sick cat, being away from my beloved California and if course the fact I lost my Mother six months ago. She was the best when it came to Christmas and my heart is so heavy as my December birthday and Christmas approach.

I find myself in new territory, sadness has never been part of my repertoire. With that said, I’m losing weight again because feeling healthy is so much more delicious than food that makes me gain weight. Health and confidence is my priority, along with collecting cans for my food drive. So many people are sad and hungry and helping others always makes me feel better. I’m trying to find some holiday cheer.

First week done and a success. Now it’s time to add my workouts and running back into the mix. I never give up. I’m 25 lbs to go to weigh 159 lbs, the weight I was six months ago before leaving California and before I lost my Mother. My final goal is 135 lbs. I can do this. You believe therefore you achieve. 

Are you trying to lose weight and get fit during this season of joy? Did you just start. You can look at it like a bad time to start, or getting a head start on New Years resolutions. 

Let’s do this. 

Love and Light

Rose

 

 

 

INSPIRATION

Starting over is never easy, especially after you lost most of your weight and you believed weight gain could not happen to you. 

Gaining weight, it did happen to me. I lost 60 and kept it off until June and in six months I have gained 30 back. The hardest part is admitting it. Now that I have faced it I’m ready to work hard again.

How am I going to do it the second time around? The first thing I did was contact a local food bank. When I commit to doing good for someone who needs it everything falls into perspective for me. Collecting food for the food bank is my first ten pound charity.

Do I still have problems and challenges? Of course, my cat Rascal is still sick and we are doing everything we can to heal him. It’s a lot of work but that’s what you do when you love. Does this mean I can neglect my health? Not any longer, no more excuses.

I did some grocery shopping so I can be ready to face my diet days. My friend Bill gave me his recipe for a post workout protein shake. It’s coconut water, a dab of chocolate syrup for flavor and powdered pea protein from Trader Joe’s. I’m going to add banana and spinach to my daily smoothies. Besides my running, workout schedule, writing I also plan to read some inspirational literature. I have owned The Alchemist for some time but I have never read it, so it’s my first book to read for week one.

Posting from my phone is new territory for me, but I believe it will help me stay accountable. Today is day two and even though we are in the midst of the Holidays I believe I got this even if it’s my second time around. Willpower don’t fail me now.

Have you lost a lot of weight and gained some or all of it back? Was it due to a life crisis? I would love to hear from you and hear your story. 

In times of change and transition I take solace in the fact that weight gain is only permanent if I believe it is permanent. It is up to me.

Love and Light

Let’s Do This 

Namaste’ 

Rose