I hit rock bottom, landed on the scale and gained nine pounds in November. My rock bottom came to a crescendo last Sunday night. After a month of stress and too many cheat days ( plus Thanksgiving) I dove head first into a dead lasagna that was sitting in the window at work. If you have been reading my blog for two years I wait tables for extra money, and lately I am working a lot more than usual. The stress of things in life finally got to me, and all of a sudden I was craving the kind of foods I only eat once or twice a year. Pasta is a no-no for me, and frankly I do not even want it and everyone is always marveled by my willpower of steel. I knew I was in trouble when I started wanting pasta more and more in November. This is not a good thing when you work in an Italian Restaurant and have to serve it every day. One little cheat turned into another and all of a sudden I am grabbing for a lasagna that was past its prime. I was mindless eating, no joy, not a special occasion cheat that I earned and savored; but just eating because it was there and I needed to ease the pain of my temporary worries and stresses. I came crashing down from a month of nonsensical eating like an addict after a high. For me it was my first real low point in two years after my 60 pound weight loss and all of my fitness accomplishments. I hit rock bottom, got on the scale the very next day and immediately gained my composure and will power. Being human is a tough gig.
Cue December 1, 2015 and a reality check, I gained 9 lbs. My first weight gain since I began my project and blog. I had maintained my weight loss for two years and was working on my fitness goals and eventually my weight loss goal of 135 lbs. In November I lost control. It happened so quickly I hardly knew what hit me. I do know this, the minute I got on the scale and saw where my month of excess of unhealthy food led me, I snapped back into gear. Mind you, I have never been a overeater and I never considered myself an emotional eater. I have rarely been a binger, but for me choosing high calorie, fattening, carb ridden foods over healthy foods was all it took for me to put on some weight. My first clue is when my bra was a little tighter. Then I knew, and I knew it was time to face the music. The music sang loud and clear, you gained 9 lbs. The scale is a cruel wake up call but a necessary bitter pill you must swallow before 9 lbs turns into 60 lbs. I caught myself before it is too late. The honesty of the scale diminished any cravings I had. I was back.
Today I begin anew. I am doing a Melissa Bender Fitness 30 day challenge and I am back to eating clean and watching my portion control. I am going to run again as well. I have not been on a run since since my 5K in October. I am also doing one charity per month now, until my scale moves in my favor. In November I collected donations for the Second Harvest Food Bank and volunteered with my friend Stan and his hiking/running/meetup group at the Second Harvest Food Bank in San Jose. Stan is such an inspiration to me, and he has run over 20 marathons. For me this blog began blending my weight loss and fitness goals with giving back to charity, and now I continue that by doing one charity a month and get back to what works for me. I am far from over.
In life I do not ask for advice, I am always going to do what I feel anyway. I look for inspiration. Inspiration is all around us, and learning from others never gets old. Sometimes inspiration comes from unlikely sources, but you must listen and have an open heart. I am happy to say I am surrounded by inspiration always, from family, from friends, from strangers I meet on my travels. Here’s to better days ahead and the inspirational people who accompany me on my journey. Love and light to all.
There would be no cloud-nine days without rock-bottom moments left below. — Richelle E. Goodrich